The concept of a ‘placeholder’ applies well to religion. I grew up in religion with a lot of mental placeholders in my head, like scaffolding keeping my brain intact until some real believable facts could be put in place. I longed for the day the placeholders could go and hard facts replace them. It made me search and search for truth and assurance of truth. I wanted to stop having to convert myself to believing God exists before getting up each morning. I thought nobody understood this about me in my religious circles. I started hunting down facts related to God and Christ so I could be sure I had real faith, not pretend beliefs. John the Baptist was a great fact to help belief in Jesus being the Christ. His historic existence dawned on me. The facts of the mentions he gets in the New Testament gospels and how those refer back to Old Testament prophecies about someone levelling things to prepare for a Messiah did convince me genuinely of Jesus being this Messiah. The facts stacked up. Still I needed more. The NT foretold the Holy Spirit being given to believers. Why not to me? Perhaps God did not think me a real believer. The beliefs I thought I had might be still those placeholders and God is no fool. Then I saw Him.
